Above Berlin

I am drifting away from here.
Ears stinging with ‘e’ and ‘o’ and ‘a’
Vowel sounds.
Eyes scorched full of
Straining teeth and lips,
They slip in and out in waves.

Your heart is a blue nightmare,
Smothered and defeated
But still beating.
Haunted like an old hotel
The ghosts of disappointment and guilt
Wander the halls.

I lean into my own shadow,
A sick sort of embrace,
And blow my hot breath into the wind.
The eyes close.

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Passed my best

Moving north and west
Along the Rhein
My face pressed up against the glass
As the mist whips past outside.
I carry you with me.

I’ve tried to relax my grasp
As I am fully aware
Of your reluctance,
Your crushing negligence.
But these ethereal fingers have grasped
At strands of nothing for so long,
They are reticent to release.

In the background
I listen to quivering vocals and the
Low rumble of the R10
Thundering along
As my mind ponders
Castles and poets,
Book burnings and motor oil,
The corners of your mouth
Turning up as you smile,
Blood in the sand,
Prison bars,
Daylight,
Freedom.

Dragon Lady

All that green makeup
And yet
I’m the one who’s melting.
And despite the time of year
There is no fear.
Not a single
Drop of doubt.

Which is rare for me.

Well then
Cast away, all hope.
Howl to the moon with me.
And with bellies full of
Spiced Hokkaido and dreams
We’ll wake the souls.

I think it’s a comedy

I didn’t want it to happen again.
No, please, not again.
But at this stage
It’s almost inevitable.
The fist plunges,
The fingers uncurl and stretch,
But the grip has slipped already.

Male voices sing
In 5 part close harmony
Of cacti and angels,
Their words slick auf Deutsch
As I imagine I can feel
The ever faster beating
Of your heart
Through the leg of your jeans and the
Few inches of warm air between our knees.

Take out the bag of oft-worn clown makeup.
Draw a smile on my bald downturned head.
Stamp your foot in the dust and howl.

I’m in the dark again
But for the faint light
of the stars.

I want to fall in love again

It always seems so
Easy at first.
Just tip forward into heartache
Like falling off a chair
Or the bike you thought you
knew how to ride.
A distinct lack of training wheels on this occasion.

If you feed me orange porcelain rose petals
I will close my eyes and listen to
the rain on the window pain.
I will remove cat hairs from the
Peripheries of my mind
And the corners of your downturned smile.
I might read poetry in hushed tones,
Your head in my lap.
If you agree
To hold my hand in the dark
I will try my best to
Never doubt you
And to keep all your brightly coloured matchsticks
In order.
To never lose your
Loveless green eyes.

Oh how I hope you care.

Gently now for fear it might break

It has been many moons
Since love has tread
In the halls of my heart.

The tapestries on the walls
threadbare and muted.
The forgotten corpses of furniture
Shrouded in white,
Still as the dead.
The hearthstone lies cold and unused.

The dust is piled up like snow
In the deep of winter
Heaped in the corners and doorways.
The emptiness of the place
Hangs heavy in the air.
Stale and tired.

And yet

It would appear
A single window shutter has been opened.
The fragile morning light bleeds in.
And perhaps it might be possible
To make out the shape
Of a footprint or two
In the grime.

And it could be
That if you stood for a while
In the now-open doorway
You might even catch the faintest aroma
Of freshly picked lavender
And the earliest murmurs
Of a long awaited homecoming.